Been a while, but that’s okay!

 It’s okay to not be okay

It’s okay to lose your way

Perhaps you are not having the best of days

The sun was shining and you didn’t make hay

You can have the best of plans written

But you can’t seem to find the will to begin

“You are better than your present” your inner voice yells 

But how to fulfil your potential, nobody tells

All you can do is wake up and try

Through the darkest nights, stand tall and smile

Though it might take a little while 

That’s your journey, and it’s all okay

But it’s never okay not to find your way back to your magic! 

The Bride Price

Picture Source: google

                                               
I saw someone's display picture, it read, I have a dream that one day to marry will be free. I'm sure I read this post three times and I kept wondering to myself, free in what sense really? that after marriage you can still gallivant and keep living like a bachelor/spinster? or free in the sense of freedom of choice where you can decide not to get married and nobody will look at you like you are an alien that must have lost its way and found itself here on planet earth? but then again, that will be restricted to some societies just like ours where marriage is seen as a mark of success and having a ring on your finger gets you more respect at society’s high table. I was just really thinking about all the different meanings the post could have, then it dawned on me that the "free"being talked about is in terms of the brideprice and other requirements neccessary to take a bride...then I laughed.

ENJOY THE WAIT!

Things will fall in place…Eventually! You'll get that car, the promotion, the girl, the lovely marriage, have your own kids, fulfil our dreams, travel the world, they will all happen eventually.

However, the question is, what’s your attitude while you are still waiting. Are you mumbling and grumbling or are you busy enjoying your waiting period?

I know its human to see your waiting period as your state of anxiety and dashed expectations but why not try something new. Don’t just wait and wait. Deliberately enjoy your waiting period!!!

I HOPE...

Quote of the day...

Talent will sure get the engine started
 But greatness won't be achieved without the tyres of consistency,
 For even the less talented have long plied the route of consistency
 They have now eaten the fruits that were once preserved for the truly gifted ones.
                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                                                    Lorita. O

               

Payback Isn't Your Bill!

Take a minute, relax and imagine...What will you do if you had the opportunity to pay back that person that hurt you so bad? Like literally...you can do anything to the person and go scot free!

What is the first thing that comes to mind? I'm sure 99% of those thoughts are illegal, ranging from murder, battery and assault, to cutting them in pieces and shipping the mutilated parts to their ancestors or maybe you are the subtle type that wouldn't want them to die but the life they are living ehn...they would wish death upon themselves.

Oh My Essence...

His voice and his face seem familiar

He must be familiar enough for mum to leave me out here with him

His kisses aren’t the regular

I get a lot from visitors coming in

But why does this feel intense and impure

I have a strong feeling I don’t want to be here anymore

…More kisses, More strokes, More tension

I’m so sure right now this isn’t right

I’m screaming as loud as I can now, shouting save me!!!

Somebody save me from this impending danger

But all the neighbours can hear is a baby’s banter

…In he goes, and out with my purity

I can now feel the warmth of my blood trickling down

Can he not see the blood? Can he not feel the warmth of my purity?

I’m sure for him its nothing but hot coffee for his cold soul

I heard mummy tell daddy in excitement that I am 9 months today

It’s supposed to symbolize the time of life

But how ironic it is that mine has just been snatched away from me

Oh my essence! My innocence!! My purity!!!

*******************************************************************

Salewa's Story

Salewa woke up at mid night like she always does, looks at the old clock hanging by her wall, she can’t remember who or which is older, herself or this damned clock that somehow functions as her alarm, not because it’s an alarm, but sometime ago, her cousin Ebuka’s ball hit it while he was playing on one of those his insomniac nights.

“It was a mistake aunty” he said.

 “Who even plays ball at night?” she yelled!

But his eyes really did look sorry. So she let it be and went back to bed. She thought to herself, if only she wasn’t so afraid of the dark, she would have closed her door and his stupid ball wouldn’t have come into her room. Or maybe it’s more of the fear of being alone than that of being in the dark. Whatever, the reason, she shoved her thoughts aside and went back to bed. But ever since that fateful day, her wall clock became an alarm making that funny noise every 12 mid night. It forces her to wake up and pray, mostly think, but she likes the idea of telling herself she prays at night.

She’s old, she thinks and one day she will start mal-functioning like the old clock on her wall and her door will still be wide open and her bed very large and empty. She thinks of how much she hates her job and her junior colleagues who come every day only to taunt her. She is very sure they are taunting her or why else will they not stop gisting about their husbands and their cute little babies or how happy their men make them. I mean, they know I am single and old, that is why they taunt me, she thinks. She most times channels her frustration on them, they call her a witch, she heard, she knows but she couldn’t care less…she’ll rather be a witch to them than suffer this frustration alone.

MY NAIJA...MY PRIDE!!!

I’m sure when you see this title, you might be like my Naija my Pride? Really? Is there

anything to be proud about?

I woke up this morning, there was no light, but before I get depressed

about that, I quickly remember there has been no light for so long

now, getting depressed won’t change that

So I choose to be happy….

My sister called me to complain about the water in her area,

“there’s no water” she said, and when the taps decide to run,

the water is too dirty! My dear, I’m, just tired!

I felt her pain, I was going to complain, but I remember what her

compound looks like

Everybody has “jejely” bought their drums…they pay the

“Meruwas” to fill it up. At least there’s a temporary

solution…

So I choose to be happy….

Things that really really matter.

This life can sha be very funny. This was indeed the biggest boy's garage at some point. I bet when visitors came to his house, he’ll pretend he forgot something in the car just so they can see his fleet of cars. Yes, this was once a fleet of choice cars, as in cars that you would look at and go "mehn...this guy hold bar o". The kind of cars that will make the girls ask the nigga why go inside, let’s get in on in the garage. The kind of car door that you open for a girl and she will melt and say awwww, you are so romantic (because it’s not the act that is romantic to some girls oh, its d type of car door you are opening) there is nothing romantic about opening a jalopy car door mbok, well except of course, you need to keep banging the door to open, then it is very mandatory for you to open the door for her.
Basically just painting a picture to let you know this was once "it". Well, at least they have some form of historic value now.

It's Always Darkest Before The Dawn...

Ever wondered if we would appreciate the Sun as much if there was no Night? Would we really know the beauty of light if there was no darkness? Would you desperately want to be happy again if you haven’t felt the strings of sorrow pierce through your heart? I doubt this.

I believe, if we never knew darkness then we won't appreciate The Light as much, just cos it becomes normal, like the light will always be there so why should I take a moment to appreciate how beautiful it is.

I remember when I went for my post-graduate degree, getting into a new environment and thinking of how adventurous it will be for me. How I’ll tour all the cities and visit all the tourist attractions, how everyday will be a holiday for me and I was just going to see that period as a vacation. In short, dem go take! This town go know say person don enter am! Well that didn’t quite happen. I had a lot of fun no doubt, but there are still places I look back at and ask myself, why didn’t I go there? I have friends who came into town for just 2 weeks and visited places I didn’t go to in almost 2 years! Why? because, see, at that time I was living there and I would wake up every day and think to myself, oh, I’ll still be here tomorrow, so I’ll visit that beautiful place tomorrow, then next week, then next month, and I never actually went to see some of those places till the day I had to come back. It just made me understand that the more we are accustomed to certain situations, the less appreciative we become of those situations.

Don't Grow Up!!!

Thinking back now to when I was much younger and I’m just wondering, what in the hell ever made me think growing up was so cool? I literally couldn’t wait to be grown up. Now I’m all grown up (or at least I think I am) and I’ve come to realize I was set-up. This was a serious set-up!

I remember those days of playing Ten-Ten and Suwe on the street and all the razz but fun games, at least the ones my mum will allow us play till she became her usual self, woke up one morning and didn’t want us stepping out of the house again. She then over-fed us with video games, of all sorts. From Mario to Mortal Kombat. We had all the recent games just so we wouldn’t go out. And we thought she just loved us so much that she wanted us to be the recent gamers, that one sef na another set up.

Food For Thought...

I lifted this somewhere and thought I should share it. Enjoy!

 Two important management lessons I learnt from a £50 note.

1. It happened some time ago. I was in an audience listening to a motivational
speaker. The speaker got his wallet out and pulled out a £50 note. Holding it up, he asked, "Who wants this £50 note?"
Lots of hands went up. Including mine. A slow chorus began to build as people began to shout "Me!" "Me!" I began to wonder who the lucky one would be and who the speaker would choose. And I also secretly wondered (and I am sure others did too) why he would simply give away £50. Even as the shouts of "I want it" grew louder, I noticed a young woman running down the aisle. She ran up onto the stage, went up to the speaker, and grabbed the fifty pound note from his hand.

Dear Alarm!

So a friend of mine walked into the office one morning, still looking very sleepy and like he'll rather be anywhere else than the office...but to be fair to him, almost everyone in the office looked miserable...sorry...always looks miserable every Monday morning, but this post isn’t about my usual Monday Morning Madness, so we will move on. So he walks up to me and says, we don’t give the alarm clock enough credit, and I go huh? Say what? And I’m there thinking in my mind, isn’t it too early in the morning and week to be drunk biko nu? He then asks me, what wakes you up every morning? Me I already went spiritual sharp sharp, God is the one that wakes me up every morning. Without God, my alarm clock will have no work to do. The guy just rolled his eyes and said, think about it for a minute, what would we do without our alarm clocks? So many people will miss very important meetings, will always get queried for coming late to work and so many important events. I then calmed down and thought about it....that’s actually very true.

Think and Thank!

I was driving home one evening, very tired, I was wishing I could borrow the film trick they use in Africa magic to disappear and appear in my room, sleeping, all chores done by some robot and another robot that will make it rain so the weather would be very cold. I was that tired....

So you can imagine my frustration when I saw this huge traffic from afar. I was like lai lai, I cannot enter this one, I turned back, James Bond style, enroute alternative route.

That Long-old Saying!

I know of a long-old saying...it’s easily said but hardly ever done!

I know of an old man

He once was full of life

They said he once had a beautiful wife

He drove the nicest cars

He could stay on the phone for hours

They said it's 'cos he had so many friends

But it’s funny how those things all came to an end

I see him now, begging on the streets

He watches the cars pass him by daily

Trendy suits, windows up, sitting at the owner’s corner

They never pay him mind

He smiles with tears in his eyes

He sees himself in them

He never helped anyone and he particularly laughed at old poor people

He wondered what they did with their youth and called them lazy

He told himself he was working hard and had enough to take care of his old self

But somehow, life out-smarted him, he no longer felt so witty

All he could do was drown in self-pity.

Happy Easter Holidays!

This is just to wish you all a very Happy Easter. Try as much as possible to share this special time with family and friends and most importantly, remember we are celebrating the resurrection of Christ.

You can also use this period to re-strategize and try to revive every venture you let die in your hands, all the brilliant ideas you let fade away.
Come back from this Holiday season a better person with new ideas and a fresh, strong will to make those ideas a success!

Enjoy the Holidays!!!

I'm Married...What next?

I really love weddings! The make-up, the flowers, the pretty ladies, the excitement in the air, the beautiful wedding gowns, the tightness in your tummy...God! That tightness, you are just too excited! You don’t have to sneak around anymore, you can explore your fantasies, and you are free at last. It’s a great feeling!

The guests go home, the food is finished, the music fades, the decoration starts getting pulled down and you are in your hotel room with your spouse, looking into each other’s eyes, smiling and most likely thinking... So what next?

This is actually a question you should have answered long ago before the wedding, but most people are too carried away with the euphoria of the wedding that they forget that it’s just a wedding and the most important thing is the marriage.

Below is a conversation between a newly married and unmarried colleague of mine in the canteen:

This is for you!

If you’ve ever lost someone…this is for you!

If you have an empty space in your heart because someone in your life just got up and left…this is for you!

If you woke up one morning, everything seemed normal up until you got that phonecall, they said someone you love just passed. They left you wondering, passed to where? Passed through where? Who came and took them across? All the weird thoughts running through your mind because your mind is too afraid to admit that Death has taken away someone you love…Then this is for you!

Deal with it from the centre!

I once read a book by Stephen covey, it talked about the circles of concern, influence and control. In a nutshell, circumstances that bother you are in your circle of concern but the ones you can control are only those in your circle of influence and control. We all know there are some things, we as individuals, cannot control. For instance, as a naija babe now, I cannot just wake up and say I’m tired of this electricity problem, I don’t want to shout UP NEPA no more, I will build the refineries and solve this problem once and for all, because I love my country and this has got to stop! Well, e fit happen for dream sha, but in real terms, when I wake up, I’ll have to deal with all the sweat from building the refineries in my dream, without electricity in my room to service the fan/air conditioner while I was “sleep-working”.