Salewa woke up at mid night like she always does, looks at the old clock hanging by her wall, she can’t remember who or which is older, herself or this damned clock that somehow functions as her alarm, not because it’s an alarm, but sometime ago, her cousin Ebuka’s ball hit it while he was playing on one of those his insomniac nights.
“It was a mistake aunty” he said.
“Who even plays ball at night?” she yelled!
But his eyes really did look sorry. So she let it be and went back to bed. She thought to herself, if only she wasn’t so afraid of the dark, she would have closed her door and his stupid ball wouldn’t have come into her room. Or maybe it’s more of the fear of being alone than that of being in the dark. Whatever, the reason, she shoved her thoughts aside and went back to bed. But ever since that fateful day, her wall clock became an alarm making that funny noise every 12 mid night. It forces her to wake up and pray, mostly think, but she likes the idea of telling herself she prays at night.
She’s old, she thinks and one day she will start mal-functioning like the old clock on her wall and her door will still be wide open and her bed very large and empty. She thinks of how much she hates her job and her junior colleagues who come every day only to taunt her. She is very sure they are taunting her or why else will they not stop gisting about their husbands and their cute little babies or how happy their men make them. I mean, they know I am single and old, that is why they taunt me, she thinks. She most times channels her frustration on them, they call her a witch, she heard, she knows but she couldn’t care less…she’ll rather be a witch to them than suffer this frustration alone.
She gets back to her reason for waking up, gets on her knees and tries to say the Lord’s Prayer, but before she’s able to finish it, her thoughts start to stray, “I want to be famous, I want to be rich, I know I am a super-star, but above all this I want to be a wife and a mother. But now, I’m just an old witch with an old clock that reminds me every day how much fixing my life needs”. She gets herself together again, and continues the Lord’s Prayer but she thinks again of how much talent she has to offer.
I’m even better than that thin-legged Bukky, but look how she got promoted and is married to a rich bobo. I’m sure she even jazzed him because that guy saw me first. Maybe I’m cursed…maybe oh. This has to be a curse. I’ll meet Iya Adura first thing in the morning. Maybe I’ll call in sick. I’m sure everyone will be glad I’m late anyway, I know they can’t stand me.
She shoves her thoughts aside again and tries to go back to praying but it’s just too damn hard so she starts to sing and sing. Hoping that one day, this beautiful voice of hers that fetches her loads of compliments will make her famous. While still singing she drifts back to sleep.
It’s 5am in the morning and Salewa has put on her pretend self. The Salewa that is self- confident and doesn’t need anybody. The self-sufficient Salewa that is bold and people only mistake her confidence for pride. That Salewa that doesn’t need Iya Adura so she decides to go straight to work.
Bukky strides along carrying her promotion on her head like her new shukwu hairstyle. She scoffs at Salewa, but this Salewa doesn’t care one bit about her, so Bukky starts to sing “some people jelox me, some people jelox me, some people jelox me because of my promo”. Salewa thinks to herself, how do they promote this thin-legged, thick Yoruba accent, ugly, razz girl over her. But she pretends not to care and walks straight to her office.
Before Zara and Kamsi start to gossip about their husbands and cute little children, Salewa decides that today will be a file clearing and arranging day. That should keep them busy and tired enough and not fill her ears with all that marriage talk.
While they are working, something hit her and suddenly Salewa realizes how toxic her workplace has been to her. She’s jealous of people young enough to be her younger sisters, she’s in competition with a lady she knows she is definitely better than, and she has become a bitter bitter woman. And like a robot, She walks straight to her HR office and pens down her resignation. No plan, no savings, nothing and she walks straight home.
It was 12 mid night as usual and for the first time in a long time, she finished The Lord’s Prayer without drifting. For her it was a big big step and she was happy.
But that happiness was short-lived because she soon realized she was single, childless, jobless and soon to be dead broke. She shoves the thoughts aside and decides to go back to sleep.
She woke up in the morning, too early for a jobless person so she decides to take a walk and get some air. Some guy says hi to her, she believes he is her neighbour. So she turns around and says hello.
Gboyega is a fine young man. He is a writer that just came back from the UK and wants to establish himself in his fatherland. He has long wondered what was eating Salewa up. He could see the beauty in her distress, the smiles in her frown and the insecurities in her confidence or maybe it was just the writer in him, trying to be poetic about everything and everyone, he couldn’t tell for sure but one thing was he sure about…He had fallen deeply for this stranger-woman like he fondly called her. She was the inspiration he needed to complete his book and if his words are half as beautiful as this stranger-woman, his book will be a best seller just like the last one he wrote.
"You replied me today", he said. Salewa was a bit confused, “sorry have we met?”
“Yes, No, I mean not really, but I greet you every morning but you never respond”
“Oh, I’m sorry I never noticed” Salewa said, but she thought to herself, the Lord’s Prayer she completed last night must have started working to break the curses in her life because how else could she explain that this young fine man was greeting her every morning and she didn’t notice.
“It’s fine, I understand that you are a very busy woman” Gboyega replies but he is very sure it is the anointed hand of his mother on his head this morning, praying for him to marry this year that made his stranger-woman finally notice him. Since his mum came visiting, that’s all she has been talking about.
“Well, I will be less busy for a while till I find a new job” Salewa said
“That’s very good!, well not good that you are jobless but good that you will be less busy, not like less busy like without anything to do but at least you will have time to do other things” he realized he was beginning to stutter and blab so he quickly pressed his Yoruba swag button and told her he’ll see her around and walked away quickly with his dog Bruno.
Bruno seemed to be extra happy on his way home. He kept jumping and licking Gboyega’s hands. Gboyega faced Bruno and said I know you are happy for me but whatever you do don’t lick this my mummy-anointed-head mbok, before the babe will see me tomorrow and run away.
Salewa said the Lord’s Prayers 10 times more on her way back home. It seems to be her lucky charm now. She saw a clock shop on her way home and bought herself a very beautiful clock. Out with the old, in with the new. This applies to both the old clock and the old Salewa.
Oh how handsome he looks in that tux, and how much I love this wedding dress of Mine, Salewa thought. My dad’s hands are shaking, I know because he is holding me tightly, I hope he doesn’t fall on this aisle…I’m glad he’s here to see this beautiful day of mine. Mummy’s smile is still the brightest in the hall. Ebuka is crying, I wonder why, he only disturbed me and broke things when he came visiting, but I know it’s all love. It seems like just yesterday I took that early morning walk where I met this man I will soon call my husband. It’s been 15 months since then but oh boy, a whole lot has changed!
She yelled I do I do I do…I do to my new job, I do to my new clock, I do to my new home, I do to my new man, I do to this brand new Salewa. Her manger was in the crowd cheering her on, just like he does in every of her concerts. He had told her earlier that her music career was about to boom and a telecoms giant had recently approached her to be their ambassador. Funny how good things come to you when you detox yourself of all the hate and fill your heart with love.
They drove to the place that will be their new home and Bruno was out waiting, wagging his tail in excitement. They stepped in and Gboyega turned to Salewa, Kissed her passionately and said “let’s pray stranger-woman for this new life we are about to begin. I am so happy you are in my life and I cannot believe how lucky I am to have you here, so let’s put God first as we start this new journey. I think I should get my mother’s anointing oil”… as he was about to walk away, she dragged him back, and amidst tears of joy and accomplishment she said,
“Let’s say The Lord’s Prayer only”. He looked on in amazement but she told him it’s more than sufficient because it brought her to where she is now.
Bruno wouldn’t let them concentrate, so they decided to sing the Lord’s Prayer while Bruno mostly barked to it!
I think I'm Salewa...Lol!!
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